A Note To Skinny Girls

It’s been a week since my last rant, and I think that perhaps I was a little too easy on my SG friends. The weather here in Iglooville Canada has been quite nice and people all around me are slowly losing clothing by each degree the temperature goes up.

I just thought that I would share a couple of friendly reminders for my skinny friends:

1) Belly tops were popular in 1997. Britney was the only one who was able to pull it off properly. You look like a giraffe wearing baby clothes, and you should really consider putting on some longer clothing.

2) Butts are supposed to fit into shorts, and should not be worn as underwear. Didn’t your mother ever teach you how to dress?

3) When wearing skirts or short dresses, please ensure you have a nice pair of pantaloons on as the rest of the world isn’t curious to see what you have going on up there. (I mean, I personally know of some pervs that may be interested, but the majority of us don’t like to get flashed for no good reason.

Anyway, I’ll be nice for now, but I’m sure when summer comes around I’ll have a lot more complaining to do!

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