Get Me To ONEDERLAND!


It’s been one year since I walked into my doctors office and picked up my nasty two week liquid diet. I was the unhappiest, grouchiest fat girl, and all I wanted was a double bacon cheeseburger. Those were possibly the worst two weeks of my life, because I have never depended on food. Fat Girl Problems, I guess?  I’ve been a little absent this 2014. Truthfully it’s because I’m in a deep deep state of depression. I get that I am pretty, and god only made me fat so that I wouldn’t have it all and make the skinnies jealous. No one can have it all… I’ve been the same weight for the last 5 months and can’t seem to move the scale into onederland. (Onederland is when an overweight person gets out of the ungodly 200 pounds and into the 100’s).

I have never felt more pretty, or better about myself. I fit into a size 31 jeans, I like to look in the mirror and I am comfortable in tight shirts. I’ve given up on leggings and I actually wear things that have zippers and are form fitting. But the scale is my enemy, and I say it everyday. It’s like the number 2 wants to marry me and won’t go away. Doesn’t it understand that nobody likes that number? If I just saw that 1, I know that it would be totally different and I would be motivated to loose the rest of it. I look at old pictures, and I think to myself how did I let myself get that big, I was so unhappy. When I look at the scale, and nothing happens, I get depressed and just feel like I’m going back to that bad bad place- I don’t know what’s going on!

If anyone wants to say nice things to me now to motivate me, now would be the time.

Xo,

200 pounds.

Image

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7 thoughts on “Get Me To ONEDERLAND!

  1. you look gorgeous!
    Do you know how much Usain Bolt weighs? probably not. And you dont have to. He obviously looks good. Would he look any less good if you would guess his weight and he would be way more than you guessed? Of course not. You dont give a flying f*ck how much he weighs.
    Same things applies to you- enjoy your life, stop worrying about some stupid number- enjoy your new you. I live almost on other side of the world and even here you look beautiful! And guess what, I dont have to know your weight to see that.

  2. Hi, I have to say that I understand how you feel. My trick is that I never weigh myself – I have my trainer weigh me every Friday and he simply tells me how much I lost that week or if I remained status quo. He reminds me that status quo is a good thing. And those simple words help.

    I started to eat green and healthy on January 28. 2013 and since then I have lost 60 pounds. During that time, twice I was informed that I had gained 2 pounds – but he immediately said that he believed it was water and not fat because according to what I had eaten, I had not eaten 7,000 extra calories during the week. The rest of the time, I lost or stayed the same. I knew going into the change in lifestyle that it hadn’t taken me 1 year to arrive at where I was and I made peace with myself that likely I wouldn’t reach a place where I’d feel content in one year. And I remind myself of that every week before I get on the scale. And it has worked, for me.

    Having said all this, I, like you, see 200 as a terrible place to be and am hoping to see myself below that when I feel content. But I have decided to not look at a scale until I am content with what I see in the mirror – and not just a number on the scale.

    I hope my words help you see the numbers a bit differently. You’re doing great and keep up the good work. Slowly but surely, it will come!

    • Thank you Reesa, for your kind kind words. It would just be nice to see the 2 I guess. I figured since my one year “surgaversary” was coming up that I would be able to see the 2’s… I’ve learned from past experiences, if I let myself down, then I start eating and I gain it all back. I’ll stand my ground and won’t let it happen this time!

  3. Wow what a pretty woman you are. Even fat you were pretty. Mark down everything you eat every day for five days and give me the list. I know that I can help you move the scale, down. Irving 514-484-7826

    Irving Epstein Sent from my mobile

  4. You look amazing. I know how you feel. I recently entered onederland and when I announced people said you look so much smaller. The numbers on the scale are not always a reflection. I’m in the same size you are and I’m 5’8. It will come. I still have 25-30 to go but I’m focusing on getting healthy first and not so much on reaching my goal of 165. If I get to 175 or 185 I know I’m no longer 289 like the day last march I went in to pick up my liquid diet. Keep on keeping on!

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