Shopping With Ronnie


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This weekend, I did what every girl hates doing. Bathing suit shopping. However, to make it worse, I went bathing suit shopping with none other than my very opinionated, very honest, very Jewish Mother; Ronnie Ginger. Shopping is never fun, especially when the scale has been stalled for three weeks, and I’m feeling especially fatter and unmotivated than ever. My wise mom says that “no one likes to go bathing suit shopping”. In fact, she tried to prove this point! When she noticed a skinny slimmer girl looking through the section, she goes up to this innocent young lady and says “Hey, you’re skinny, you must hate shopping for bathing suits, don’t you? See Hilly, even skinny girls hate shopping for this stuff“. Seriously, what the eff did I get myself into, she talks to strangers, and embarrasses me, and why am I going shopping with her? I turned bright red, and made my oh-so-honest mother walk away from this poor girl.

While we were rummaging the aisles this time, we didn’t pick up any fantaSIZER or moomoo swimwear, and I also didn’t head to the plus size section. Go me! Before I go any further, please keep in mind, that just the sound of Ronnie breathing, makes me want to go on a wild rampage and rip things and smash holes into walls (I have anger problems, shut up). So, while I’m in the dressing room, huffing and puffing, breaking a sweat, Ronnie comes in all giddy and happy and asks me to come out so I can show her how it looks. Is she serious? Like I’m going to come out looking like an overstuffed walrus? Anyway, I get the nerve to come out and strut my stuff, Ronnie is standing there with this look on her face, and I’m expecting something like “NO, change now” to come out of her mouth,  but, I was surprised when she just started smiling and tells me how great I look- seriously Ronnie, what pills did you take before we went shopping?

My non scale victory of the week was that all the bathing suits fit me. I even had to take one in a size smaller because one we picked out was too big. Old me would have NEVER had to change something for the smaller size. Having this type of great feeling, makes me want to get back on track and start to get past this plateau that I am at. The fact that Ronnie and I went shopping and it didn’t result in even ONE fight, was nothing short of a miracle. Seriously, years ago, one of us would have ended up with a black eye and it wouldn’t have been me, just saying.

Tanning Is Slimming


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Now that Hefty Helga has sadly passed on, there is officially nothing in my way stopping me from losing weight. The scale has been at the same place for the last three weeks, and then finally yesterday, when I got on the scale before my scheduled date, it had finally moved down two pounds. I’ll take it, and it’s better than going up two pounds.

I figure that summer is a great time for me to really put my mind to this weight loss again, and actually stick to it. I mean, not only because I’ll be tan, and we all know dark is slimming, but because I’ll have a lot more time to sit outside to tan, than to sit inside and eat snacks all day. Speaking of snacks, snacks are killer. I could just eat snacks all day. Snacks are delicious. Even the word snack sounds delicious, snack, snack snack. I sound hungry, but really I’m full. I just wish sometimes I could occupy myself with other thoughts instead of wondering when my next snack will be.

I haven’t been in a bathing suit since I was at my fattest last year. Well, I just lied. I was in a bathing suit last night. Around my apartment. Alone. Dancing to some Island beats. Just strutting by myself, seeing how I liked it. Genius didn’t seem to think I looked that bad, because he just stared at me panting, and didn’t even bark at the sight of me in swimwear.  It didn’t look that great, however looked better than last year. I wasn’t popping out of all the seams and not going to lie, I actually felt pretty damn good. (Would have looked better with a tan though)

Anyway, dark is slimming, better get back out there in the sun.